1) Where else can you stroll into wearing your sweats, your boyfriend's t-shirt and very minimal make-up? (Ok no make-up but who has to know?) You can quite literally roll out of bed, puffy-eyed with hair somewhat resembling Bellatrix Lestrange's from Harry Potter, and no one will judge you.
2) You can time your arrival with the aqua-aerobics class going on in the pool and have a little giggle to yourself on your way in. A little legal high to make you feel better about the intense pain you're about to endure.
3) Britney Spears and Enrique Iglesias can sing their hearts out on your iPod and no one will laugh at you. Unless you forget that just because you can't hear yourself singing doesn't mean everyone else becomes deaf to your 'musical skills'. Not until after you've finished anyway.
4) That hot guy you've told your friends about? Yeah, they don't have to know he's in his sixties and smells a bit like cabbage. Let them think hottie actually exists! What they don't know can't hurt them.
5) The mats are pretty comfortable, in a weird kind of way. Draw eyes on your eyelids and no one will ever know you're asleep.
6) Oh haiiii muscles! Well, fat that's not quite as bad as it was before. Sort of.
7) Those Skechers you 'invested' in years ago? Well at least they've seen daylight now. Just remember to match your socks, people stare you know.
8) You get to spend loads of money in Pineapple, because hey you're going to wear it AND you look like a professional dancer. If only Louie Spence could see you now. You'd land a part in Pineapple Dance Studios in two minutes. It's got to be the hair band you threw at the sales assistant at the last second.
9) Burning enough calories means the deluxe chocolate cake and/or Ben & Jerry's you consumed last night NEVER HAPPENED.
10) Don't feel bad that you get a stitch after about four or five minutes walking on flat ground. The guy next to you who seems to run uphill at about 80mph is actually running on batteries, like that stupid rabbit you see in the Duracell adverts.
